$0/moFreeHiddenPatron count not public
$2.5/moI poke you with sticks and croon softlyHiddenI'll only poke you with pretend sticks but I will croon softly in the Earth's own secret language while uploading posts about writing, brain stuff, weird things I just learned, weird things I just made up, what I'm working on, what I'm supposed to be working on, and how much I like you. A private blog, basically, updated at least weekly, available only to you.
$5/moI lay wounded birds at your feetHidden...but only because I have total faith in you to heal them and not make tiny wind chimes with their bones. You'll get access to the journal and soft crooning, with the addition of fragile feathered beasties aka FICTION EXPERIMENTS THAT ARE IN NO WAY GUARANTEED TO MAKE SENSE OR HAVE PROPER ENDINGS. They might turn to smoke or they might end mid-sentence, and they'll probably include things like ghost town rivalries, itinerant knife sharpeners, a museum of apricot trees, and the girl who dated Winter (the season), got pregnant with a snow baby and moved to the moon. You'll be invited to a Zoom hangout every Sunday where we'll chat about writing and creative things, do writing exercises, and more. It's a delight! You'll also get access to our patron-only DISCORD SERVER, where the community can connect in chats, post pet pics, post writing, participate in the ongoing Create-along where we cheer each other on in the creative projects of our choice, and more!
$15/moI hide weird stuff in your houseHidden...stuff that may or may not be alive, so be vigilant (and sleep with your mouth closed).
At this tier you get the soft crooning and fragile beasties, access to the Discord server and Zooms, and you'll get to occasionally VOTE ON WHAT MY NEXT FICTION EXPERIMENT will be...
Plus, I will delight in STEALING YOUR NAME in order to people my stories with bizarre facsimiles of you. You might pop up anywhere, doing anything: kissing monsters, tap-dancing poorly, hiding magical tomes in your step-mother's oven, or hunting a shapeshifter over the taiga. Don't worry so much. Just sell me you name. What could go wrong? *cackles and cracks knuckles*
$50/moI rat out your super powers to the fuzzHidden(Just kidding, I'd never do that. I'll point the fuzz in the wrong direction and create a diversion while you escape.)
At this level: WOW. THANK YOU x A LOT!!! You're amazing. You get all the other stuff from the previous tiers plus:
I'll mail you A SIGNED COPY OF ANY BOOK I RELEASE, anywhere in the world. FYI I don't have any books coming out in the near future, but I'll periodically send you other stuff to express my gratitude :)
$100/moI circle you warily on my battle mooseHidden...because come on, $100? My moose is in awe.
You get aaallllll the other stuff plus twice the gratitude of the last tier and:
I'll write you an effusive fake thank you for some totally made up thing in the acknowledgments section of any books I publish while you're a patron at this level (including my in-progress secret novel). You won't know what it is until the book comes out, but I promise it will be weird.